This evening, England are set to take on Montenegro in the next round of the Euro-Qualifiers. In previous years of the tournament, England have faced a hostile welcome from the Balkan nation. In 2011, former captain Wayne Rooney was sent off and received a three-game ban after retaliating against aggravated behaviour from Montenegrin player Miodrag Dzudovoic. In 2013, England players were verbally abused and targeted by missiles from the Montenegrin fans. Despite the events of tournaments past, England manager Gareth Southgate has instructed his squad to handle any incoming hostility with the utmost grace and dignity.
It’s not just on the pitch where you might encounter hostility, the same environment can be found in boardrooms across the country. What lessons can be learned from Gareth Southgate’s leadership and applied to the boardroom?
Don’t add fuel to their fire
If someone is displaying aggravated behaviour, one of the worst things you can do is mirror that behaviour. No matter how much you want to call the person out on their behaviour you gain nothing by doing this. If you feel the need to feedback, you should speak to the chairperson of your board in confidence. Often, the best way to handle the situation is to respond with a simple, firm, yet respectful statement such as: “It’s not okay to speak this way.” This is simply letting the person know that their behaviour is not constructive in the meeting. If you communicate a statement like this in a neutral, calm, yet firm stance you are enabling the boardroom discussion to move forward without upsetting this person further.
Be understanding and acknowledge their perspective
When people don’t feel their voice is being heard by their colleagues, it can be a gateway to feelings of frustration and a display of hostile behaviour. If you sense that a fellow board member may feel this way, then you could attempt to demonstrate that you understand their feelings and perspective. Use eye contact and engaged body language when they express their thoughts to the rest of the board.
If you find yourself in a situation where you don’t understand their perspective, there is no harm in asking for more information in a civil tone. People often need reassurance that you want to hear what they have to say. A confrontation in the boardroom is not productive if only one person is speaking. In order to solve the problem and find a productive resolution, a two-way conversation with the person in question is necessary. Make sure you take the time to listen to the other person’s point of view and don’t interrupt them. Actively listen and show that you are considering their points, even if you don’t agree.
Remind them of the consequences
When a hostile individual insists on dominating boardroom conversation and won’t take no for an answer, it could be worth deploying consequence. It can help to make the individual aware that their behaviour is undermining the boards ability to get the results they want. By reminding the disruptive individual that they may delay important boardroom decisions or prohibit a business from making progress could instantly make them want to stop being confrontational. The ability to identify and assert consequence is one of the most important skills you can use to stand down a difficult person. Effectively articulated, consequence gives pause to the offending individual and compels them to shift from violation to respect.
